The gentlemen of the Otterburn society have convened in the Northumberland village of Otterburn in November for all of their annual conferences since 1982.
As the standard was about to be raised above the ramparts of the Otterburn Castle Hotel in 2013 however, it became obvious that alternative facilities for the annual conference would be required if the traditions of the Otterburn Society were to be maintained.
In an extraordinary display of resourcefulness, Mr Karl Beattie, heraldic officer to the Otterburn Society, grasped victory from the jaws of defeat by hiring the Memorial Hall for the day.
Not only that, the usual facilities were also hastily provided to make for a most comfortable conference venue.
At the AGM held that day, Mr Beattie was rewarded with the office of Treasurer of the Otterburn Society for the subsequent year, with responsibility for ensuring that the thirty third conference of the Otterburn Society in 2015 would be another great success.
Despite the long forgotten “monumental cock-up of 2003”, Mr Beattie was to triumph.
It had been unanimously agreed that despite being the “spiritual home” of the Otterburn Society, the facilities of the village of Otterburn now fall short in satisfying the high standards maintained by the Society, and that, regrettably, an alternative venue for the annual conference of the learned society would be required.
Mr Beattie decided that the thirty third annual conference of the Otterburn Society should be held in the splendid house and grounds of Matfen Hall, birthplace of his great grandmother.
All was arranged and members arrived to see the Standard of the Society flying high alongside the union flag.
Prior to this members had been delighted to find themselves guests of long standing friends of the Otterburn Society, Dianne and David Harding. An excellent lunch of soup and sandwiches was served at their idyllic country pub, The Crown Inn at Humshaugh.
The Crown Inn is (unfortunately) more than a “short walk” from Matfen Hall, but transport was kindly provided by Howard Snaith, Otterburn, to ensure the safe transit of some members back to their conference venue.
Click here to see other members of the Otterburn Society setting off from the Crown Inn to their conference venue, Matfen Hall.
Members were very warmly welcomed to Matfen Hall. Every effort had been made to accommodate the demanding requirements of the Society and a barrel of the famous Becks “Otterburn Broon ale” was tapped and served.
Having sampled the brew to his satisfaction, Chairman Jordan took up his position behind the lectern and brought the meeting to order. Presentations commenced.
The Chairman’s presentation was entitled “The Society Lectern Water cannon – putting theory into practice”. This he quickly did and then went on to provide the Society with a very moving eulogy on the demise of Milk Quotas.
On a very positive note, however, the Chairman was pleased to inform members that the title of his contribution to the next Otterburn society Journal would be “The GATT Import of Frozen Beef and Veal: Allocation of European Community Quotas, 2014, and the way ahead”
Mr Jordan also talked about his duck shooting.
Each member made an excellent presentation:-
- Mr Scarborough updated members about his exploits in Malawi and Germany.
- Mr Beck updated members on development in the Brewhouse.
- Big dick Tarn talked about his cycling exploits.
- Mr Flack made a most amusing presentation however, details of Mr Slack’s presentation are not being released in order to protect the men and women deployed in harm’s way.
The Chairman did not hold back in exhorting the benefits of the newly installed lectern mounted water cannon.
Mr Firth’s presentation was on the Deltavator – an invention conceived within the Department of Agricultural Engineering by members of the society, Dan Hettiaratchi, Basil Firth, Nick Jemmett, and “Mad” Mike Hall.
He presented a new application for the linkage mechanism the Strandbeast and presented a scale model of this for members to take away and construct at their leisure.
Jeremy Featherstone asked the question “What am I planning to do with the rest of my life”.
This turned out to be more a round the table discussion than a presentation in the traditional sense of the word, although Mr Featherstone did blow a good toggie !
Treasurer Beattie presented a new surface to air “collateral damage risk mitigation device” that has been developed by him.
Mr Beattie did acknowledged that the equipment may fall under § ML4 [M-a] of the UK Military List and that, despite wanting to support British manufacturing, in principle, certain authorisations may be required before he is able to supply his customer from the UK.
Unfortunately it was not possible to demonstrate this device at Matfen using a live round.
The thirty third annual general meeting of the Otterburn Society was brought to order by the Chair, Andy “IFB & VQ” Jordan.
Apologies from Daniel F Woods and the former Laird of Fingesk were noted.
The Treasurer was complimented on his choice of venue for the conference. It was agreed that future Treasurers should consider venues potentially further afield than Northumberland.
With the Director of Music residing in Germany it was agreed that Mr Scarborough would be elected to the post of Treasurer, an honour which clearly moved him. Otterburn XXXIV would be held in Hamburg.
Mr Beattie was elected Chairman of the Otterburn Society.
Daniel F Woods was elected Secretary of the Society.
There being no further business, members enjoyed a Champagne reception followed by an excellent dinner.
